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Owen Wilson - Don't Give Up On Us

hey owen, don't give up on us baby...

Comics Britannia: BBC Four

90 percent of me thinks this is amazingly cool and 10 percent of me thinks, fuck Lorcan, you're a fucking idiot why aren't you a go-getting academic that's on these sort of programs and be an expert and stuff. Anyway, BBC 4 are doing a Comics: Britannia strand about British comics

check this out, it's described as:

the centrepiece of BBC Four's comics season - is a new three-part series celebrating the classic comic strips of the past 70 years.

here's the run down:

1 : Concentrating on the work of comic book geniuses such as Leo Baxendale, programme one looks at the comics of the 1950s and early 1960s to explain how the anarchic humour of colourful, cheap publications like The Beano enchanted a generation. Watch a clip: "This is Switzerland" -->

2:This programme focuses on adventure comics - from Eagle characters Dan Dare, Captain Hurricane and Roy of the Rovers; to School Friend, Girl and Bunty. Includes interviews with celebrity fans such as Jacqueline Wilson. Watch a clip: "Two demented magpies" -->

3: In the 1970s and 1980s comic books became more graphic, adult and darker. This programme features interviews with writers, such as Alan Moore, who spearheaded this new wave of comics. Watch a clip: "I live and sleep eggs" -->


Argggh, and then there's this, I've been doing a paper on loneliness and Ditko for years, but suppose he has been going on about comics for years, and on national tv, and having sex with a girl...

Kitchen Confidential Ep. 1 : Exile on Main Street pt.1

jimmny?

Back in the kitchen again like a fucking mook

As both Tom Moran and Stasz pointed, this movie is a woefully inept depiction of kitchen life, look, they are smiling, there's no stains on their whites, they don't have hairnets on and well...em...they're fucking smiling, it's like making a Titantic movie where the Titantic has fucking wings and turns into a grumpy santa and gives us free drugs whenever our life turns out to be a steaming pile of shite...

Fuck it, I'm such a fucking idiot, it's like you're you're trying to be nice and helpful like how you were brought up, but where does it get you. I'm back in the kitchen again like a fucking mook. In the pub I work in the landlady took over the kitchen and I stupidly/helpfully said...'I have kitchen experience', the four most dangerous words in the English language, up there with 'I like being shot' and 'Please bollick me relentlessly'. It's the usual shit, need the money, need the shifts, next thing you know, you're in an apron, holding a perforated stainless steel spoon making a face of resigned indignity and swearing under your breath (and occasionally over).

Problem is, I'm good at it, calm under pressure, work fast do everything right, I feel like Martin Blank, I don't like doing it but I'm good at it (p.s. unlike Martin Blank, I'm not riding Minnie Driver and I'm shite at hand-to-hand combat and looking cooky in a black suit and shades...as far as I know...come at me when I have a pen in my hand--which is most of the time--and we'll find out. )

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I had the worst Sunday shift ever, Sundays are the worst (=busiest) days. I got invited to a superhero party the night before, and as I'd never been to a superhero party before*, I decided to go. It was a good party all in all, but as I am getting old, every party I go to is filled with couples, but, and here's the kicker, because we're all late twenties/early thirties, they all act single till their bodybuiding Hungarian bodyfriend turns up and your like 'hey dude thanks for that strong Hungarian moonshine stuff, have you met this girl she's totally crazy...' and he's there 'yes she is my wife' or something. The only advantage with having couples all about the place like fucking rabbits is that there's normally booze leftover. Hence being late for work.

So I'm late for sunday service, the landlady's going nuts and I'm hungover and guts gurgling all day. The only highlight is working with Tom Moran, to whom I'm making funny faces and throwing faux gang signs that I've just made up (based on the greeting hand signs that young tractor drivers give back home). Apart from the staff, pubs are full of boring idiots that have no life, so any bizarre beaviour from the staff is like front page news on whatever newspaper they 'print' by scrawling it on skinned beermats. So they're all like, 'oh, I hear you were late!' and I'm thinking in my silent indignant way (see above) 'you fucking pricks, you're never late for anything, because you have no fucking jobs beyond making your beerbellies and rednoses grow and checking out your supernaturally weak arms in the mirror while talking about Monty Python, Terry Pratchett and fucking Pink Floyd. It took me a like a day to come up with this nonwitty comeback to their snide shit:

Barfly: Have you found a proper job yet?
Me: No, how do you afford it?
Barfly: Afford what?
Me: The bodyguards...
Barfly: The bodyguards?
Me: The bodyguards you must have to employ to prevent from getting beaten up by almost everyone you talk to for more than five minutes...
Barfly: Bodyguards? I don't have bodyguards...
Me: Good, I've got a five-minute break...

So I'm working for about four hours straight and all I can hear above the shouting and ovens is my gurgling guts, I'm dying for a shite, like, really badly, but, surprise! there's a fucking football match on, so the cubicle is always occupied. Here's the kicker, I have to keep going to the loo to see if the cubicle is occupied to have a dump, but it always is. So the landlady's sort of looking at me and thinking 'what? Is he slacking off going to the loo every half hour or so?' and I feel like going, 'look, I'm not getting to the fucking toilet, it's blocked up with fucking football idiots'. So it goes, until the end of service (cubicle still occupied) and she's bollicking me about something and I have to go 'Look! I'm really sorry, but I am actually shitting myself right now, as we speak, I am going to have go up to your loo right now'...and I boot it up to her house loo to crap and inspect the damage, thankfully, it was a quite minimal watery one, the kecks where wrapped in like three plastic bags and chucked in the bin, then I had to work commando for like an hour. It was a whole new strata of kitchen work sucking. That's how shit kicthen work is, when crapping yourself mid-bollicking is some sort of heroic rebellious act that you tell everyone about. The younger guys I work with were all, 'why would you tell some one that', and I'm thinking well, 'it was a funny story why wouldn't I tell it?', jeez, they just don't know some of the other stuff I've done, doing a wee gravy fart is the least of it.

*What , like you're surprised? do actual pimps and hoes go to 'pimps and hoes' parties? do actual perverts like The Rocky Horror Picture Show?

Spice Girls - Clive James Show

Skunk Anansie - Weak

Elastica - Waking Up

Echobelly promo video for King Of The Kerb

you have a late night google talk with a certain dumb riffer to blame for this 1990s nostalgia

Bleak august thoughts made better through tv...who'd a thunk it...

The postings, are being a bit superficial of late, lots of pictures and videos, no genuine ramblings from young Jimmny, a lucky escape, indeed for yous all. 'August' doesn't really cover the current reign of bleakness, I propose it should be called 'Bleak August' or 'Blaugust' in future.

Sometimes when you work a few jobs at once it can be ok beacuse whe you fuck up in one, you're doing alright in the other, but when you marginally fuck up in all of them at once it's horrible and the bleakness of this supposed August doesn't help much. Like, today I had to wear my Trespass jacket, it's warm and fucntional and all, but it makes me look like the fucking Unabomber or something.

This morning the whole place was so bleak and empty I almost convinced myself while attempting to get up and do laundry that an actual zombie attack had occurred. Not this kind of wank, but really on a psychological level if it happened. I was thinking, 'right so it's pissing rain, the zombie must work on some sort of smell basis, that and movement and visibility, perhaps, for once the rain will be my friend' 'First priority, go to Budgens and loot as much Amber Leaf, Jamesons, Diet Coke and err...maybe food...as possible' 'then, an attempt to get to the butchers, hopefully there'll be so much live meat running about that the zombies won't care about the dead meat from the butchers, so I can nip in steal all the serious knives and sharpeners nip to the hardware shop, with the big knive, get as much nails as possible board up the whole place and watch my Battlestar Galactica box set while drinking Jamesons and smoking Amber Leaf...and wait until everone in Norwich eats each other, I looked up the population it's only like 129,500 that won't take that long, time for the Firefly box set, The Prisoner and Sledge Hammer! Job done, see in all the zombie movie the fatal flaw was like moving around too much and trying to find out what's going on, doesn't matter millions of people are dying right now and there's no zombie attack and people do more or less the same thing, zombie attack, it's just one of those thing. People keep panicking about global warming, they just read/watch enough sci-fi and comics, I thought we'd all be eating Soylent Green whilst been buggered by monkey robots in spikey cars, a few hurricanes the least of it.

For every hero in a zombie movie, there's probably about 50 people just kicking back having a nice time, waiting for everone to eat each other...

This is just a summary of my reverie there was a long bit on improvised weapons constructed from belts, my weight set and the planks from under my bed....


I'm sure having an ipod that's 85 percent Frank Black at any one time can't help, have gone for some MIA, LCD Soundsystem, Half Man, Half Biscuit and Spike Jones (the first one) to lighten the mood, feck it I'm tempted to just make the ipod all Spike Jones and Bob Wills and His Texas Playboys and as much Buzzola cds as it can handle...in your face Blaugust





Anyway, thankfully H-Factory came round and saved the day by bringing around the Star Stories dvd and the second series episodes her mam had burnt for her and we had beer and pizzas and then I watched some lovely Fry at 50 documentaries on BBC Four, so the day ended up ok, no postapocalyptic cataclysms as of yet...but there's always tomorrow....

Real life Caddyshack...will he do Ghostbusters next?

Was just up to the room from watching a bit of Caddyshack and then I see this on imdb:

Bill Murray Arrested for Drunk Driving in a Golf Cart

The officer claims mystery surrounds the golf cart and who owns it - although Murray isn't facing theft charges: "It was a golf cart. How it ended up in this predicament I don't know. I have done this since 1968 and I've never experienced anything like this."

P.S. can I use this post to mention a geeky trivia nugget that I share knowing with Petey B:

How Lorenzo Music voiced Peter Venkman's role in The Real Ghostbusters (and they were the real ones) and he voiced Garfield in the cartoons, but Murray voiced Garfield in those there fine movie pictures...

'Ah little Colin, when will we ever learn eh'....

If you haven't already, check out Channel 4's Star Stories, the best comedy the channel is pumping out these days, faint praise I know, as likes of the amazing Spaced has its Friday night comedy memory shat upon by the likes of The Friday Night Project, Balls of Steel and The Charlotte Church Show, at least the new series of The IT Crowd's on this week.

Anyway, any descriptions I can burb out don't do justice to the likes of 'The Ballad of Britiney Jean", see below, 'cooooeeeee look's like ah dun maxxed my meal!'

Star Stories - Britney Spears (Part 1/3)

Star Stories - Britney Spears (Part 2/3)

Star Stories - Britney Spears (Part 3/3)

Jimmny Homunculikes...

The mysterious Badbrute is of the opinion I look like this guy, Newton Emerson, editor of the The Portadown News, BBC story here.

And that I look the guy with virgin on his head from Skins, played by Mike Bailey

I suppose it's not far off, I used to look like this:

and this:

Things to note: I'm holding up 'happy 12th birthday sign' like it's a mug shot, my quilt cover is more mature than man current Secret Wars II one, (gawd, and I wonder why no girls come round), the books: comics ratio of the shelves remains more or less the same only greatly increased, there's also copius religious imagery which as since been replaced by action figures and erotic bronzes.

Frank Black Francis - The Rockafeller Shank - Live 2007

Black Francis - Threshold Apprehension

Frank Black's Bluefinger

Hooray for the 'king of shouting'

Liner notes to Bluefinger from Frank Black.net

Do I like Frank Black, well yeah maybe just a little, or more close to the truth, the guy's never off my ipod. If you meet me in the street and I'm shouting along with my ipod, chances are it's a Frank Black luric, or I've just lost it. Kinda like the people who think They Might Be Giants only released Bird House in your Soul, the people who think Black has done nothing since the Pixies do my nut. He has been hugely prolific in the last few years. The glut of outtakes/compliation like stuff albums blinded me to the fact that he is about to release a kick ass rock album Bluefinger. I had all the tracks on this bar 'threshold aprehension' (with the class line: 'Talk to man just get a little work/talk to the hand just get a little jerk' ), I figured it was a one off single, but there is a whole album of this rock out shit! excellent.

List of previous Jimmny Frank Black love ins here

ah, the Jimmny, seldom happier than when he is clutching a new Frank Black release....

Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip 'The Beat That My Heart Skipped'