BBC Radio Ulster/BBC Radio 1, Voicebox and Sunday Strip Club

It's go at Lorcy central or 'Lorcom' as I refer to it, in my head. Last night was on Hotrod McCaughan's Hot Rod of Comedy, a regular segment on BBC Introducing in Northern Ireland with Rory McConnell.

Which you can listen to here, it's about one hour and 25 minutes in.

Myself and Hotrod at Palookaville at the Oh Yeah Music Centre

Telephone interviews are always a bit weird because you don't know if you are going on too long or not enough, I end up pulling Tim and Eric style faces to myself after each sentence....

I also always immediately think feck I should of said this that or the other. Will be doing some new character madness at the Voicebox Comedy on Friday, at the awesome Safehouse Gallery which I can't wait for, Marcus Keeley's Voicebox nights have been growing steadily in popularity month after month, this one I think is the biggest line up yet, with about 20 acts with 5 minutes each, and us regulars will be doing character bits/sketches and videos in between, I made and overelaborate photoshop thing for it

One of Marcus' most recent videos from his youtube channel

With great outtakes.

and I'm doing a best of powerpoint things: "Sex and Superheroes and The Story of Poor Auld Jesus: The Highlights" at The Sunday Strip Club at the Pavilion on Sunday 9th May

Congrats everone, we made it through January....

Officially, the most bastardingly shite of months ever, hence the lack of blogging as trying to articulate the horror would only increase it. I made it through, but only just, using the time honored Irish way of hot whiskeys and copious TV shows and films. Mostly my Laurel and Hardy box set, a thing of immense beauty, the great Fringe, Dollhouse and still amazing The Twilight Zone

Speaking of the Twilight Zone and feeling like you're living in it, I've also been being blasphemous about 30 times every day, and at 25,000 euro a pop that doesn't come cheap...p.s. God doesn't exist...and is a cunt...fact! sorry for the language, but he made me say that for the laugh. Full listing of Ireland's new blasphemy law here, I suppose you could read it along with the Murphy or Ryan reports and decide what is truly blasphemous.

Wording here:

	35.— The common law offences of defamatory libel, seditious libel and obscene libel are abolished.
		36.— (1) A person who publishes or utters blasphemous matter shall be guilty of an offence and shall be liable upon conviction on indictment to a fine not exceeding €25,000.
		(2) For the purposes of this section, a person publishes or utters blasphemous matter if—
		(a) he or she publishes or utters matter that is grossly abusive or insulting in relation to matters held sacred by any religion, thereby causing outrage among a substantial number of the adherents of that religion, and
		(b) he or she intends, by the publication or utterance of the matter concerned, to cause such outrage.
		(3) It shall be a defence to proceedings for an offence under this section for the defendant to prove that a reasonable person would find genuine literary, artistic, political, scientific, or academic value in the matter to which the offence relates.
		(4) In this section “ religion ” does not include an organisation or cult—
		(a) the principal object of which is the making of profit, or
		(b) that employs oppressive psychological manipulation—
		(i) of its followers, or
		(ii) for the purpose of gaining new followers.

Mmm, "employs oppressive psychological manipulation" not the Catholics then, oh no.

Anyways, mark your diary or scrap of paper that you lose for Voicebox on February 5th, it's going to be great with Enda Muldoon, Marcus Keeley, Scott Calonico & Stacey Mead, Hotrod McCaughan, Aaron Marshall Anne-Marie Mullan, Ed Goodall, and Robert Best, with Ruaidri Ward MCing. I can't wait.

Facebook Event page

Safehouse site event

Stand up bit that includes my blasphemy routine, which I would not have written were it not for this ridiculous law, so will they fine themselves?

Hello there, would you like a lick of me cone....

Must have a think about my dress sense as I have recently been mistaken as a priest twice in the last few weeks. I suppose I do dress in black, read books, and am celibate, although not by choice. Will be on Today FM... tomorrow and have some other top stand up dates coming up:

Wednesday, October 21, Alison Curtis of Today FM will be broadcasting from McKenna's in Monaghan, home of McKenna's Brew Ha Ha Comedy club between 10 and 12am. Will be doing an interview talking about comedy and club. McKenna's is the Ulster finalist in the Platinum Pub Award 2009.

Friday November 7, Voicebox, Marcus Keeley's night at the Safehouse, Belfast

Saturday November 14, Stand up at The Bankers, Dublin,

Friday November 27, Mr and Miss Soapbox, St. Gregory's Centre of the Arts, Norwich

Saturday November 28, Laugh out Loud at the Rose, Norwich.

In other news:

Jodie Foster is super-pleased to be in a brass band.

...and George Clooney discusses digital stimulation techniques with President Barack Obama.

Nerdgasm

These pics are from a while back, but I love 'em. They are by fellow Irish comedy superstar Marcus Keeley and document a lovely post gig visit to Forbidden Planet in Belfast where myself and Gerard McKeown checked out the 'Goth Section'.

There is nothing that makes an aging geek happier than a large, soft core erotica photograph book.

Sure aren't we all 'broke but fixable'

I haven't bought this yet, on my last visit I spent 4.99 on this gem, but I went to visit the above and it seemed to have it's wanking/arrow pulling hand broken off. Thought 'Broke but Fixable' would be a good/wanky name for a comedy stand up show.

Let me get some action from the goth section!!

"ooooooh...Eeenid"

sure, aren't we all livin' in a Ghost World

"wow, that's lovely...I can't afford it though"

For prosterity my first major headling gig! at the Pavilion Bar

Well Hello There....

It's been a while, a lot has happened but it's a head-wrecking non-blogworthy nature* so I won't bore yous. Cut a long story short have moved back to Ireland and am curently doing a combination of freelance writing and substitute teaching and stand up, so kinda the same thing different location, but with wee school kids shouting 'howya sir!' from chip shops while I'm singing along with Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long-Blog thing and the Commentary! on my wee ipod.

and the Tron soundtrack by Wendy Carlos. There has been some good times, have been seeing more of family, Badbrute and the Brugoes and some great stand up gigs in the company of Marcus Keeley**

See above me all tuxed up for the Monaghan Person of the Year Award black tie

Check it out, there's nothing better than being formally dressed while drawing cartoons of Batman with his wee lad out and Superman pissing himself... these were the pencils I was doing for these redoes of a stand up bit for scanning:

*It depends what kind of blog you like, these days even writing a 'blog' seems quaint, all the hip kids are Lady GaGaing their plurks until they tweet all over the place....the little dayglo feckers well 'I'm staying, I'm finishing my coffee...'
**check out his It was dark and I was drunk blog who is going true similar travails as ole Jimmny H since we both exiled ourselves from Nrrwich and has a great theory about Zac Efron:

A friend and I have a theory that whenever Zac Efron has his period, a Kinder Egg comes out, and the plastic capsule has a piece of paper inside with a list of names of people he has to save in the next 24 hours, otherwise they die.

In further Norwich nostalgia, Marcus and I went to a comedy gig he reviewed it and I photograped-well I held up a wee sliver box in the vague vicinity of people and pressed the bright eye blink button-at the Nowich Arts Centre:

As a performance poet/comedian, it’s rare for me to watch a local live stand-up comedy show in its entirety. Regardless of whether or not I’m on the bill, I’m more likely to be found outside smoking and looking anti-social, politely ignoring my contemporaries’ sets because I have seen and discussed them ad nauseam, or in a small, dark room, blowing raspberries into an empty bucket in anticipation of my curtain call. However, Dan McKee's Saltbox Comedy Club at Norwich Arts Centre was a different affair. Upon given the opportunity to review the gig, myself and fellow comedian superstar Lorcan McGrane threw on our standard-issue Irish malaise, haggard faces and nicotine-saturated charm and made our way to the venue.

Ah happy days, although thinking of them they were pretty horrific days of Marcus and I wandering around a cold Norwich in the rain trying to figure out where to stay....

Soap box gigs

Just a quick one, in the middle of starting a new unit I designed on gender identity and transgenderism which I'm looking forward to, we'll see if the students will. Have a nice gig tonight at St. Gregory's Centre for the Arts, where I'm described as: Lorcan McGrane: A deliciously deviant wordsmith who has been grafting a name for himself around Norwich, known for tackiling the most inappropriate of subject matter with side-splitting results.

Also on the poster for the all day Soapbox on October 18th! see above.

Upcoming Stand Up Dates...

Check it out, my first professional press pics from Smoking Mic here's my current date line ups...


April 2nd, Cabaret at the Birdcage, 8.30 £1:
Weds 2nd April 9pm £1 Founders Scissors Paper Stone host a candlit evening of mischeif and melody.Music: Dick York, Tom ParkesComedy: Lorcan McGranePLUS Competition time

April 4th, Laugh Out Loud at Ambar at the Odeon, 9.00, £2.50
Will be MCing for the first time, looking forward to this will be a really great night

April 10th, Smoking Mic, York Tavern, Norwich 8:30, £5

April 17th, Saltbox at the Horse and Drey £5.00

April 18th, Smoking Mic, Swan, Loddon 8:30 £5

April 19th Smoking Mic, Fisher Theatre, Bungay Special Improv Night 7.30, £6.50

April 21st, Laugh Out Loud at The Rose, 8.30 £2.50

April 24th, Smoking Mic, Kings Head, Dereham 8:30 £5

April 30th Comedy Cafe, my London debut!!

May 2nd, Smoking Mic, London Tavern, Attleborough 8:30 £5

May 4th Laugh Out Loud at the UEA drama studio, special Fundraiser for out Edinburgh gig!, 8.00, £4

May 9th, Smoking Mic, White Horse, Trowse 8:30 £5

May 15th Laugh Out Loud at the Queen Charlotte, 8.30, £2.50

May 16th, Smoking Mic, Silver Fox Taverham 8:30 £5

May 22, Downstairs at the King's Head, Crouch End, Open Mic night

May 31st, Smoking Mic, Queens Head, Wymondham 8:30 £5

June 2nd, Laugh Out Loud, The Rose, Norwich 8.00 £2.50
There will be tears!, a LOL farewell gig in a way before our Edinburgh show.

June 4th, Smoking Mic, Fisher Theatre, Bungay 8:30 £5

Youtube Hecklefest II

A while back, before I had been doing stand up long I just used to type in 'heckle' onto YouTube just to see when, how and where other comics got heckled, like a sort of an inoculation for being heckled just to see where people went wrong and did a post on it here. I still do it now before every gig when I feel like I'm going to puke, like a sorta ritual. When I looked up wikipedia for the same term I got this quote for getting rid of hecklers...supposedly, from Dane Cook

Comedian Dane Cook was heckled on his album "Retaliation", in the middle of a joke about Burger King, where the heckler yelled, "Make it happen, man! Make it happen!" Dane replied, "Shut up! You're ruining the show for everyone around you. Don't do that." The heckler kept going, and Dane replied, "Shut the fuck up, or I'll have you kicked out of here!"

What wacky comedy fun folks...here's some more


I haven't been heckled so far, but I feel, looking at these clips, heckling normally happens when someone is extremely arrogant and they cannot conceive that someone might think they were shite, it's like in their bizarre brain parallel dimension, no could ever conceive of them not being funny, while everyone in the world is going 'please! for the love of god stop now!' I have some examples:


Ian Paisley Heckles the Pope.....I know it's not stand up comedy per se, but it is comedy, he told them he was going heckle! and he had loads of posters in his pocket...and then he claimed they attacked him, ah poor auld popey, and you've left us with the that nazi guy from toy story....

You Insufferable Arsehole...I couldn't resist (thank you very much ) the best heckle ever, but you have to understand ...who Pat Kenny is, learn from here and here and here and here....and here...

Craig McLachlan's stand up, phew....this is tough to watch, first up he's trying to stand up to a football tv show crowd before ever doing it before with jokes that are all based on his previous neighbours success, but god, this is funny for all the wrong reasons....

Biceps: we have to include this mook, he cannot believe his homophobic views might get challenged by an audience member and his arms are meant to be some sort of hilarious comeback...and lest we forget very close to Richard Pryor's getting beaten up by the folks bits....'look at my biceps you think i can't meet a girl...' yeah you could meet a girl but she may want to kill you...meet doesn't really have the same meaning you think it does.

Lest see the heckler beater's shall we

You can't beat Mitch Hedberg

or Arg Barker

comedy bio

honking on a smoke pipe in Krakow, more pics and laffs to follow:

Had to write a comedy bio for the current tour, don't know if this will do, any suggestions welcome, does this cover it?





Lorcan McGrane is an Irish comedian based in the UK. He came from the rural Irish village of Rockcorry, Co. Monaghan to Norwich to write a PhD called “Superheroic Bodies: the Corporealities of Contemporary Film Superheroes”, along the way he has worked as a barman, kitchen porter and chef. Stand up allowed him to combine the geeky knowledge of academia and the humour of bar and kitchen work. Tales of his trials, tribulations and unhealthy obsessions with fictional Amazonian superhero ladies can be found at The Life and Times of Jimmny Homunculus (jhomunculus.blogspot.com). Beginning stand up in 2006, he has foisted his perversions and peccadilloes on an unsuspecting public with surprising success. Lorcan’s stand up is a mixture of bizarre stories of his times in rural Ireland, Belfast, Dublin and Norwich and his ongoing obsessions with sci-fi, relationships, porn and comics and the surprising connections between them all. He is usually to be found pottering around second-hand bookshops, comic shops, charity shops and dodgy bookshops (or would do if Norwich had any decent ones). He has been hailed as a chronic masturbator, but he is actually really good at it. Lorcan has performed in most of the clubs in the burgeoning Norfolk comedy scene, including Laugh out Loud, Earlham’s Dirty Little Secret, The Salt Box Comedy Club, Smoking Mic Comedy Club and the Outline/Yer Having a Laff competition, (in which he was a 2007 finalist, forthcoming final: March 13, 2008). He has also performed at the famous Battle of the Axe night at the Ha Penny Bridge Inn, Dublin.

The Embargo Can be Lifted....

hahhahahh hheeee etc...

We're ready for our close up Mr. Welles.....

Like there ever was an embargo, I just want to feel like I'm a media network or some shit. Anyway, stop the presses! we're taking our stand up show to Edinburgh. Tom Moran, Jon Brittain, John Kearns and Myself will be performing our show, "Don't Rub Your Funny on Me" at the Standing Order (It's a Wetherspoons) in Edinburgh as part of Free at the Fringe. We're on every night 9-10 from July 31-August 31 with more slots besides, we all can't wait. It' won't make us famous or anything but it'll be seriously fun, so if you happen to be in Edinburgh you can hear our comedy rants for free and at a reasonably priced Wetherspoons!! So if you you want to see us in Edinburgh come up, and it'll be in a room in a Wetherspoons for free with cheap booze and expensive gags, well some of 'em are cheap.

names wise I typed up some ideas, some good, some not so...

Straight outta Norwich
Live from the means streets of Norwich
Alright boi
John, Jon, Tom and Lorc
Don’t Rub Your Funny on Me
The First Kings of Norwich
Laff Nelsons
Pun’s Labyrinth
Punshine
Norwich Parcan (John Kearns's came up with this, I had to look up parcan, it was a clever pisstake of Cambridge Footlights)
Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (I liked the idea of it just being the name of a crap movie rather than a pun on a movie, also a kinda injoke with me and Tom on his 'love' of Doug Jones)
Funtastic Four: Rise of the Morning Duvet (Tom's)
Is that supposed to be funny
Funny, Peculiar.
Desperately Seeking the Ride
Foursomes and Moresomes
Inbred Space
The Pun Ultimatum
No Country for Old Jokes
Flyer Idea either, a photoshop job or us in cowboy hats and sheriff’s outfits with the requisite hairstyles (I left this in my list of titles it was deamed quite unweildly for a flyer title)
Their Will Be Jokes
East Anglian Promises

But the whole doing film puns on films that are out now but might not be current this July might've been a problem. Just after a great night at Laugh out Loud, at the Rose, it's the first place I ever did stand up and always the best, the audience is really friendly and you get to try new things, and then you find out what's good, whereas the more the frightening places you feel like just going for the tired and tested stuff. Today I read my favorite bits from Brenda Love's Encyclopdia of Bizarre Sex Practices here's her blog I'd recommend to anyone just for the great illustrations.

Such tales from the Norfolk tour, in Swaffham there was about eight people in the audience and they dwindled to four when there was a fight outside the pub, there was some idiot sitting on s tool shouting shit the whole show, in the interval he was telling racist jokes. For the second half me and Jon came out to join audience and he just goes "I hope that fucking Irish cunt isn't coming back out", must but that up on the blog as a review. I was round the corner going 'yeah that irish bollix, coming over here and stealing our broadband! that fucking Irish cunt', really loudly in cunting Irish accent, ah well, he's still in Swaffham and I'm in Norwich stealing his broadband (I would say stealing his women but we only saw about three all the time we were in Swaffham)

Laugh Out Loud January 21 2008

Tom Moran's other half Jemma has taken some great shots of the last Laugh Out Loud night, which went really well despite being statistically the most depressing day of the year and myself and Tom not feeling the best. It was the first time doing stand up since the Laugh Out Loud christmas special so it was good to get back on the comedy horse so to speak and do well.

Stand Up Madness explosion, Laugh Out Loud, Earlham's Dirtly Little Secret, Smoking Mic...

A new year, a new chance for people to hear me tell embarrassing stories of geekdom, teenage bullying, dead seagulls, pornography, She-Hulk...you un/lucky* people
First up is Laugh Out Loud a the Rose on Monday January 21, 9-11pm. Laugh Out Loud Myspace

Tom Moran MC
Andy Leitch
Giles Derrington
Christian Ancliff
Lorcan Mcgrane
Jon Brittain
John Kearns

Then It's The Workshop/Earlham's Dirty Little Secret on January 30th:

MC Carrie Anne Guthrie
NORMAL FOR NORFOLK
Andy Palmer,
Kirsty Hudson
and other great supporting acts


Then the beginning of Richard Melchior's Smoking Mic comedy tour on February 4th:

With

Richard Melchior, Jonathan Brittain, Dan McKee, Greg Powles and some ranting Irish geek


Smoking Mic Comedy Tour

Thursday 14th Feb:York Tavern, Norwich

Saturday 16th Feb: Kings Head, Dereham

Wednesday 20th Feb: The Swan, Loddon

Thursday 21st Feb: White Hart, Swaffham

Saturday 23rd Feb:London Tavern, Attleborough

Tuesday 26th Feb: Railway Tavern,Holt

Wednesday 5th March: White Horse, Trowse

Saturday 8th March: Silver Fox, Taverham

Thursday 20th March: Queens Head, Wymondham

Wednesday 26th March: Fisher Theatre Bungay


they had a press shoot on sunday that I couldn't make because I was making roasts

but if I had been available, here's how it might have looked

Smoking Mic...dare I say it...Smoking Mick?...

*delete as applicable

My Dirty Little Secret

I know, this must be very boring, but don't worry the shameless self promotion will end soon. Below are some pics from the Earlham's Dirty Little Secret Comedy night. 

Didn't get any pics of David Trent he was on the bill with us and one of the best of the night. Christian Ancliff and Dan McKee also did great sets.  The night was organised and MC'ed by Carrie Ann Guthrie

Although people say my set went well, I think it was not as good at some of my other ones, but it was good to do almost all new material (smae old themes of porn and sex though, more geekiness was in evidence)  and try it out, will have it more polished for Laugh Out Loud on Dec 10th at the Rose.  There was quite a mix of ages too, so again felt like shortening some of the more perverse bits. It's a great experience though in how to reword things to be clearer in the joke. I had a bit about a priest coming up to me in primary school when I was reading a Fighting Fantasy book 'Phantoms of Fear' and he goes ' you don't believe in all those goblins and demons and such', I was like no, because, like, it's a book, I don't really believe in fictional supernatural characters that appear in books, and that they talk to me and guide my life...I'm not fucking insane. I then decided to follow it up with the 'hilarious' nonpunchline, 'see what I'm saying is that all Christians are fucking insane', yep didn't go down well, should have just let the first bit percolate. 

Me not impressing some older couples by claiming that all Christians and religious people in general are insane lunatics, note to self: atheist philosophies do not necessarily equal punchlines...

Whoop! first time with my name on a poster though...

Tom and I have the traditional pre-gig smoke and drink

Young Tom Toms

Tom Moran and Kate Bouchier think about their doirty little secrets

They had these little pages where you were meant to write down your 'dirty little secret' mine reads: "I am a Ball Bag"....see above.

Had cheered up by this point...

'Will tell mucky stories about tgirls for food'

A consoling hug from young tom toms

Was it something I said? yes maybe as I said it through a microphone in a crowded room.

Cambridge Based comedy/poetry troupe 12 Guage in mid flow...

Kate with gun (not real...as far as I know) either way it's a got a sexy touch of that video Samuel Jackson is watching in Foxy Brown, don't it...

The merriment progresses at Delaneys (aka 'Deshamey's' the after hours pup of choice for bar staff every Sunday/Monday and also most of the pissed up lunatics in Norwich who don't want to go home) with one of the 12 Guagers, talking comedy, drinking Guinness... it doesn't get any better than this, the odd ride would be nice...and some of them have been very odd.