Getting old, the big 3-0: Cock and Bull Story

I didn’t think aging and the whole turning 30 thing would affect me, but I was in the library the other day and noticed that some books I wanted were on the lowest shelf and I momentarily couldn’t be arsed to bend down and get them. I imagined my viva where someone was asking “why didn’t you quote such and such's work on…?” and I was there saying “hey! It was on the low shelf, I’m an old man, I’m not reaching down to the low shelf to get some ‘shouldn’t-have-been-published-in-the-first-place’ wank just to say prove I’m aware of it’s presence, my trousers my rip or I might fall over or something'.

The other age scare I had happened the other Friday. These days I teach and do office hours* from 9 to 5 on Fridays. So by the time I’m finished there’s no places on campus open for food and I can never eat before class--nerves and fretting, whether I'm doing well or not. So anyway, I normally go up to the sports park where's there's good food. I ended up on the loo there (see: nerves) the other week and the lights go out in the cubicle and I can’t see a thing. The logical side of me (the lights are on some sort of automatic timer) gives way to pure panic after a few minutes (…maybe the lights haven’t gone out, maybe something biological has finally keeled over in the ‘Jimmny H 3000-a-tron’ and that’s it, I’ve finally gone blind! No more Film Studies for me, I’ll have take music appreciation or something).

Luckily the lights eventually came on and I was alright to go about my business. Which was a good thing because it was the weekend I choose to celebrate my 30th (again!) I managed about three 30th birthday parties. These included Friday night madness in Grad Bar and going to see Cock and Bull Story on Saturday and more pints on Saturday and Sunday, no wonder I feared going blind. Thanks to all who put up with the charade and made an old man very happy: Labhaoise & Pete, Hannah, Lawrence, Neil & Shelley, Karl, Joe & Jen, The Belgian Monk crew and many more.

*This is where you sit in your office waiting for nonexistent students, I don’t feel bad sitting there doing nothing expect putting up my weirdo certificate and pictures of She Hulk and drinking coffee because we don’t get paid for it anyway.