Monday, May 28, 2007

An actual Jimmny conversation....at the Goober Patrol gig



Peter Andre and Jordan unveil the 'doner kebab' of wedding cakes

I went to see my mate Tim Tims in his great punk band Goober Patrol at The Cricketers' Rest, check out their youtubes where they lost their galleon and went bowling and dressed up like kirk and co. They were playing with the Mustard City Rockers, which in a small town Norwich stylee also played in the Rose when I was working last night.

Anyway it was a great night, but as usual being allowed out of room to talk to ladies is always a faux pas waiting to happened.

Nice Lady: so your doing a PhD on superheroes, you must really like superheroes.*

Jimmny: Well yeah, but I understand in terms of their historical and cultural context, I don't think Superman's a real person, even if he was I'd probably think he was a boring dick, I'm not a lunatic Christian that thinks there's special superpowered being that's gonna scoop me up to heaven and give me a big hug for being good.

Nice Lady: I'm a Christian

[the actual words of rant are hazy as blogger did that weird overwrite thing that sometimes happens when I tried first tried to type this up on Sunday night, but is was along those lines, and of course you can tell the punchline a mile off, and her friend was a christian too and they had to leave early and go to mass...]

*See here's the problem this is a perfectly reasonable sentence but I sometimes feel that when you say you like superheroes, some religious types think you are a hop, skip and a jump away from being a converted godbiter just because they think you believe in fictional characters that resurrect themselves and fly and shit.

Who's to say that in two thousand years time there won't be any difference in authrity between the old and new testament and the book of mormon and Jordan's autobiography? Can you imagine that travelling two thousand years in the future ,say, and there's factions of Jordanists and you are trying to explain that she was just a model and she married a guy made up of sausage. And they're like 'heresy!' Jordan's secret orbs contain the secret to eternal life and we will all get to live in her fluffy white mansion and get to sing 'Insansia' with St. Peter Andre for eternity....god and then the Jodie Marshists weigh in and it's World War VII...

One person hears a voice and he/she is psychotic, a few thousand or million hear voice and it's a 'religion' and you kill people because of it. It is like people fighting over whether the wolf or the three pigs were 'right', so you're a Little Red Riding Hoodist I can't talk to ya I'm a Big Bad Wolfist....

Where did that come from, see what happens when you watch a Bill Hicks dvd over and over.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'd definitely convert to Smashism.
I should start a religion now dedicated to The Hulk.
Bow down before the Great Gamma God, tremble before His Olive-toned Omnipotence! His Asparagus-hued Almightiness is mighty indeed!