Irish Election News!: There's the votes... [pats votes]

Look at the size of me column!!

A certain dumb riffer and I are having no end of fun by keeping track of Fianna's Fail's own Eoin McLove: Thomas Byrne . Check this shite out above, see wee Tommy Bryne's column, I'll wager his nurse GAA footballer wife Ann will be pleased. On the one hand, you kinda have to hand it to the nurse/GAA/jumper/cake lover, he did utilise new media in his campaign quite well....but if these guys have flickr accounts and want to appear 'hip' etc. There is always the possibility that some wisearse who knows nothing about politics might just put them up on his blog and attach captions that he thinks are funny by acting like he's fecking on Have I Got News for You not sitting in his pants on a Friday night after watching Justin Lee Collins on Jonathon Ross and listening to Foxy Brown and drinking Carling. But...

Decision '07: Lads we need some fucking Buckfast in ...no, no! Buckfast isn't the way to go, it's three crates of Harp and some Whiskey...and thats' a dealbreaker... Johnny Leather Jacket Pinkshirt here's gonna get us some MDMA too...

Look Ma! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! I'm like fecking Nicole Kidman in BMX Bandits, eat my dust fuckers!!

Congratulations on your confirmationTommy, don't spend all your confirmation money on matchbox cars and bangers...ok Uncle Bertie... I won't.... just let me shake hands with Billy O'Shatner here will ya....

Now Tommy, did you fill out your FAS application form....yes Nan....can I have a go on your red puncher?..... No! you can't, you know what happened the last time...

See Tommy, you have to carry the three here, you have to get the hang of it or you'll never leave 4th class....I know, sorry Uncle Bertie, but I've been playing 'football' with Ann and she makes me do things...

Man, I love our Fianna Fail underwater headquarters, I just hope there's not a great white shark out there looking for revenge like in Jaws 3: 3-D or Jaws...The Revenge...

Ah man! the best thing about being in Fianna Fail was when Uncle Bertie took me to see the Old Irish Justice League: from l-r: The Brown Avenger, Plaid Promethea, Grumpy McFuck, Billy O'Shatner, the Red Hallion, they fucking rock man!

Look! Uncle Bertie! I've got a girlfriend, I'm straight! I'm straight! I like football! I like football!

Down with this sort of thing!...careful now...

Well hello young Tommy, you've just been confirmed I hear...yeah Mrs. Clinton and I didn't spend any of my confirmation money on bangers or anything...have you ever been on The Simpsons?